Remember when boys used to pinch and elbow you in class to show they liked you? That led to them making you check ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to profess your love (or, your dislike) for them. If you played your cards right, the next step was something my aunties always referred to as courting. That’s some ancient process where the guy rolls out the red carpet for your affection.
I think the art of courting died somewhere circa 1950-ish. These days, you’re lucky if you get a Can I come over? text, or a What you doin‘ tonight? e-mail. And don’t hold your breath for him providing you with a meal because he’s coming over to your house to eat the food you bought and cooked in your kitchen.
So I ask, what happened to dating? Does anyone go on actual Would you like to go to dinner with me on Friday at 8 at Chez Whitey? dates anymore? Is dating dead or are men just cheap? Or, maybe women are giving the goods away without the need for the dates? Perhaps since courting died, no one really knows HOW to date anymore.
Not to toot my own stuff, but I think I’m well-worthy of being asked out, putting on some nice duds, being driven in your car (on your gas dime) and taken some place decent (it doesn’t have to be Le Cirque but it can’t be In & Out burger either) for a meal that comes with no strings attached. Unless, of course, a sista wants some after-dinner strings… hey, we all have needs & I don’t judge.
In return for these dates, I will provide you with my undivided attention, my witty banter, my blinging smile (no, I don’t have diamonds in my teeth) and, perhaps, some of the good softlip when the date is over (the lips on my FACE… get your mind out of the gutter!).
Now, you don’t have to take me out three times a week (I do have other things going on). And I’m well aware there’s a recession going on. But it would be nice to get a weekly offer to do SOMETHING (dinner, movie, ice skating, concert, museum trip, walk in the park, go karting, kumbaya-singing… something that brings us closer together)! These are all things we women ultimately wind up doing with our girlfriends. Some of my best ‘dates’ have been with my crew. Damn shame my girls love me better than any man ever has.
Women shouldn’t have to beg for a man’s time and likewise, we shouldn’t have to plan everything either. It wouldn’t kill you to shave, put on some real pants and take us out. Man up and take charge… we like that, no matter how independent we are or may seem.
I’m tired of dating myself, dammit!!!