Witches' Brew | White Jesus Approved Rss
Witches' Brew | White Jesus Approved Rss

BET Awards: Fashion

6

From the mind of Elphaba Of The Brew | Posted in BET Awards 2009, Fabulous Fashion, Fashion Tragedy | Posted on 06-28-2009

I have drawn the short stick and had to suffer through this entire show to report the Brewshyt fashions that are bubbling up in LA. I predicted lots of gloves, glitter and penny loafers in misguided homage to the King of Pop. And your cousins did not disappoint.

*Brew Note: In an homage to this cheezy ass show, no purchase of a Getty image was going down! This review is gonna be as bootleg as the show it reps!
***

One woman’s struggle for relevance continues… So, it wasn’t enough that we had to give this broad a gyno exam on Twitter? I would think the only way to go from that is to be oh, just slightly moe modest.. no? No?
Seriously-
These cries for attention are boring me. Get a hobby, volunteer or something. Shit.

SIGH

WTF in the CandyMan Striper hell? Kudos on getting the weight down..but you coulda premiered it in something a little less ”What magazine would you like to read, sir?” fashion, Ant’nee Blackblush Anderson.
And Brandy’s brother… dare I say? You look *gulp* Good!

Mario- I know times are tough and all..but did you really need to recycle some of the satiny tops of your Dancing With the Stars costumes?
Nice biceps doe.. they almost distract my cougar ass from that dome piece!

Finest homewrecker in the land (allegedly)!

Even in his ‘mourning’, Joe couldn’t keep his eyes off of her assets… seriously Joe- we’re going to have to have a talk!

HER FACE IS UP THERE!

Amber Rose.. hi…Boo… I like how you and Kanye are role playing tonight.
Let me guess…Construction worker and naughty 80′s nurse?

Amerie, I wanna like you.. I always have, really. But zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Plus.. the bootlike sandals–while hot– look well.. FUGGING HOT! It’s the end of June in LA for goodness sake. It’s like Beach on top, winter in NY down below. Meh.

And…as if on cue..look at this escaped troll from under the London Bridge. She looks like a casual toilet paper roll. Is it formal denim? I don’t ‘get it’.

Fire your stylist- stat- she hates you! Keri. Damn, Great body, pretty face.. yet you have on the happy dinosaur cocktail collection, stars and scales oh my!

Ahh ‘Raji.. boo.. this isn’t a real awards show. Look at you taking it all serious like, looking FABULOUS.

See ‘Raji- you could have just pulled out your mom’s old ’80s Business wear.
It’s like she was over this already.. I don’t blame you Ty.. I don’t.

From the Broke Black Barbie Collection? No seriously: Fuchsia, Glitter…POUF ANNND FEATHERS? Omanosir!

My favorite performance ‘get up’ of the evening. Ya girl Bee… in her PANTIES, sanging ole Catholic Spirituals. I guess she put on the see thru Christmas Tree skirt to be respectful? WTF?

Though, I guess it’s better than this, SOUNDED. Holy Screechin‘ cat of all Tributes. Why does this woman have a career?!



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Comments (6)

Kim said on 29-06-2009

:::snicker:::
The Madd Rapper said on 29-06-2009

Amerie and Amber Rose have on the SAME dress!!!
That's fashion hell!
Bree is.. said on 29-06-2009

Yep. The thing is.. no one noticed Amerie enough to pay attention!
W i l d c h y l d said on 11-07-2009

Ok okay hereeeee I go….

Cassie got in a fight with a weedwacker WE KNOW WHO WON

Anthony Anderson got beat down with a BULK bottle of pepto bismol

Mario been spending way too much time with Chris Brown

Alicia =lawd hapmercee she's in my dirty thoughts lol=

*skips next pic*

Amber Rose and Amerie didn't have on the same dress her back wasn't out (Thanx to the 47 second video of Ambers backside on youtube I know things!)

Estelle HOT mess
Keri "Stranger BITCH" hottER mess!

Taraji- Fabulous.
Tyra-Turrible

Why did Omarosa even come outside?

No comment on Beyonce – wait she look like she's starring in a foreign porn with that outfit- I said NO comment lol.

Ciara needs to saddown.
W i l d c h y l d said on 11-07-2009

p.s. Monica got dressed in the dark.
& Someone said Keyshia looked like a powder puff girl.
make money said on 14-01-2012

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