*Sigh* I have come to realize that really really really bad things happen with some men when they come into a lil wealth. I have known a certain man for many years, he’s always been fun, respectful and just overall a really swell dude. We didn’t end up a couple but that’s ok, you don’t always have to be in the love zone to enjoy having someone in your life. We have shared a ‘grown up’ activity here and there, some fun, some food (cause Pipes don’t play that) and some major laughs. So the other night I’m driving home from work and I get a texas message:

Dude X: Hey girl, what chu doing? meet me at so n so bar, let’s do some drinks

Pipes: cool! see you in a little while 

So I gets there, all cute n sessified and smelling yummy like spanish whore like I do and he hugs me and greets me like a normal human being, orders me my fav drink (a french martini) and then things take a turn towards horror. He leans in and whispers “yeah finish that drink so I can fug the chit outta you” SIR EXCUSE ME???” oK now I guess I should note that I’m not a shy, clutch my pearls kinda chick, not even close, but even a loosey goosey chick like me has lines. 

So ok, I usually allow everyone one infraction, he coulda been confused by my beauty or some shit right? Hey I can understand that….. well big mistake, he then leans in again and says “open your legs” (I had on a skirt) *another blank stare*. He had me straight trippin boo! and not in a Steve Martin/King Latifah kinda way, but more in a “is this ninja finna fingerpop me at the bar??….. while I’m acutally sitting at the bar?????” …… yeeeeaaaaa, I think that was def the plan.

But here’s the really disheartening thing, years ago when I first met him he was just the sweetest, most considerate, most kind man ever. Over the years he’s acquired some things, moved up in his career, makes goobs and gobs of money and loves to tell anyone who will listen that he’s rich. Money has ruined this once awesome guy, he is now 100% USDA Asshole, I doubt the old him will ever return. When he was making average money he was the best but now his climb up the tax bracket ladder has completely turned him into the most unsavory character.

So needless to say after I rejected his demand to be fingerpopped at the bar he proceeded to go on a tirade about how all the bishes in the bar wanna get at him and I’m crazy to not have my ass bent over giving him the public bitness blah blah blah. So I knew I had to leave…… but not before I fiinished my drink and ordered me some food to go, Piper’s mama is a fool but she ain’t raise one, sheeeiiitttt

Then I get a another texas message while I’m driving home:

Dude X: I’m sorry, I think I might have gone too far, I miss you….

HA!!! Son?! you think????