I don’t watch televised drafts on a regular, but I have watched enough to know that I don’t like how some of your mommas act. Tonight, millionaires will be made when the NBA holds its 2012 draft so that gives us a few hours to get some “get right”. So I’ve come up with a list of the stuff White Jesus frowns down on. You can thank me later, as Drake likes to say:
1) No excessive jumping, coon clapping or screaming ‘Hallelujers’!
2) No leopard, Easter Sunday attire and NO head to toe matching.
3) Tame your hair hats. If need be run and get a new one, like from the more sensible Vivica Fox collection.
4) 1 kid minimum and make sure she/he matches the baby’s mouva you’re bringing along.
5) No stepping, line or praise dancing in the aisle.
6) No sunglasses inside, ever!
I could go on and on…but I think this covers the essential bamma habits. Don’t forget instant riches brings out the worse in people, so after your baby retires you, use that free time to take an investment class to help keep him on the right track and please don’t let ESPN do the “woe is this family who fought from the dirty streets of xyz city and now they’re living in a deluxe apartment in the sky” stories!
Chris Bosh is a step closer to the NBA championship but he’s also got a foot in a PR nightmare. Allison Mathis, the mother of the Miami Heat star’s 3 year old daughter recently lost her job and had to apply for food stamps. Mathis is also said to be close to losing her home. She gets just under $3,000 a month in child support for their daughter, Trinity. Now, her lawyer says Mathis is entitled to about $30,000 of Bosh’s $18 million salary, PER MONTH! Adding to their issues, Bosh wants to take their daughter with him to London for the Olympics this summer, but the catch is, he doesn’t want Allison to accompany their toddler and she is not having that. Allison also tried to join the cast of Basketball Wives but was subsequently blocked by Bosh’s attorney. The bigger issue here seems to be in what level of luxury should Trinity (and her mother, maybe?) be living if Bosh is making millions and his daughter’s mother is on food stamps. Usually, child support is based on the standard of living and care that the child would receive if he/she was still living in the home of the breadwinner. But in this case, maybe not so much. I’m thinking to avoid the public relations problem, Bosh should at least cut her a check in the amount of her yearly salary from the construction secretary job she just lost (nice gesture!), encourage her to hit the pavement for a new gig and keep it moving to an NBA title.
So, Brewchies, what’s your call? Is Chris Bosh obligated to pay more to keep both his ex and their daughter living an equal or similar standard as his current wife and new baby? What say you?
Nothing to do with the story, I just love this high five fail!
There’s no way, with hindsight, I would’ve ever called up Larry, called up Magic and said, “Hey, look, let’s get together and play on one team.” But that’s … things are different. I can’t say that’s a bad thing. It’s an opportunity these kids have today. In all honesty, I was trying to beat those guys. I don’t know if they would have been on my team.
-NBA legend Michael Jordan on LeBron James’ “decision” to form a superfriends squad in Miami.
I think Jay-Z is trying to run the Tri-State area…
Mr. Carter and the Russian billionaire/new owner of the New Jersey Nets, Mikhail Prokhorov, are gracing a new mural on the side of a building overlooking Madison Square Garden… you know, WHERE THE NEW YORK KNICKS PLAY??? That’s like your husband’s old flame moving to the house across the street and flaunting her assets when you go out to get the mail. Scandalous!
The 225-x-95 foot mural should be done this week. When it’s complete, it’ll show Jay and Prokhorov with the Nets’ logo and the words “The Blueprint For Greatness.” The Nets’ CEO says it’s all part of an “aggressive marketing platform” to get New Yorkers on the Nets’ bandwagon since the team will move to Brooklyn in a few years.
So, Knicks fans… y’all mad? Wait. Are there any Knicks fans?
Posted by Witch Hazel | Posted in lebron james, nba, rumor | Posted on 18-05-2010
After days of letting rumors spread like wildfire, LeBron James’ lawyer is finally speaking out against the internet buzz that his client’s mother is fooling around with Cleveland Cav’s teammate Delonte West. The James’ lawyer sent a cease and desist letter to the site that originally published the rumor calling it “irresponsible speculation” that didn’t warrant a denial. But, they’re denying it now.
Posted by Witch Hazel | Posted in lebron james, nba, rumor | Posted on 16-05-2010
Word out of Cleveland is LeBron James may have had more on his mind than basketball during last week’s playoffs. It’s been rumored that his teammate, Delonte West, is doing the nastaaaay with LeBron’s mother, Gloria.
One source said:
“…Delonte has been banging Gloria James (Lebron’s Mom) for some time now. Somehow Lebron found out before game four and it destroyed their chemistry and divided the team. I am not making this up, I wish it wasn’t true but it happened.”
And there’s word that Gloria has a history of hooking up with LeBron’s friends and teammates. She reportedly dated his former agent’s brother, which some claim was the real reason the agent found himself fired.
So far, LeBron, his momma, Delonte and the Cavs organization are keeping mum. But the rumor is spreading across the innawebs like a virus.
Posted by Witch Hazel | Posted in gilbert arenas, nba | Posted on 25-03-2010
Dayum! Was he preparing for the Tea Partiers to knock on his door?
Suspended NBA baller Gilbert Arenas is still waiting out the rest of the season after bringing guns to the Verizon Center. Arenas claims he’s owned as many as 500 guns. So far, he has not been sentenced but he could face 3 months in jail. For the first time, we’re getting a look at a few of his guns.
Suspended Washington Wizards star Gilbert Arenas hopes the power of the pen will spare him from the strong pimp hand of a judge. Arenas wrote an Op-Ed piece in today’s Washington Post, apologizing for his recent gunslinging. He also hopes his words will show kids how dangerous guns are:
That message of nonviolence will be front and center as I try to rebuild my relationship with young people in the D.C. area. I know that won’t happen overnight, and that it will happen only if I show through my actions that I am truly sorry and have learned from my mistakes. If I do that, then hopefully youngsters will learn from the serious mistakes I made with guns and not make any of their own.
Gil says he’s trying to right his wrongs. So, are you buying it?
Suspended Washington Wizards star Gilbert Arenas hopes the power of the pen will spare him from the strong pimp hand of a judge. Arenas wrote an Op-Ed piece in today’s Washington Post, apologizing for his recent gunslinging. He also hopes his words will show kids how dangerous guns are:
That message of nonviolence will be front and center as I try to rebuild my relationship with young people in the D.C. area. I know that won’t happen overnight, and that it will happen only if I show through my actions that I am truly sorry and have learned from my mistakes. If I do that, then hopefully youngsters will learn from the serious mistakes I made with guns and not make any of their own.
Gil says he’s trying to right his wrongs. So, are you buying it?
The short bus and idiot’s table just got one more rider:
You can add Javaris Crittenton to the “will dribble for food” line. NBA commissioner David Stern suspended Washington Wizards guards Gilbert Arenas and Crittenton for the remainder of the season for having guns in the locker room.
Stern said guns will not be tolerated! And to top it off, both players were suspended without pay for their roles in bringing guns into the Wizards’ locker room.
Arenas is in the 2nd season of a 6-year, $111 million contract.
Taste the Brew to read Stern’s full statement on these two dumbasses.
[Commissioner Stern's full statement]
“The NBA has conducted a thorough investigation of events relating to this matter.
“It is not disputed that, following an argument on the team’s flight home from a game in Phoenix, both Mr. Arenas and Mr. Crittenton brought guns to the Verizon Center locker room and — with other players and team personnel present or nearby — displayed them to one another in a continuation of their dispute. The players engaged in this conduct despite a specific rule set forth in the collective bargaining agreement between the NBA and the Players Association prohibiting players from possessing a weapon at an NBA facility, and reminders of this prohibition given annually by the NBA to players both in writing and in person.
“The issue here is not about the legal ownership and possession of guns, either in one’s home or elsewhere. It is about possession of guns in the NBA workplace, which will not be tolerated.
“I have met separately with Mr. Arenas and with Mr. Crittenton. Both have expressed remorse for their actions and an understanding of the seriousness of their transgressions. Both have volunteered to engage in community service in order to turn the lessons they have learned into an educational message for others. I accept fully the sincerity of their expressions of regret and intent to create something positive from this incident.
“Nevertheless, there is no justification for their conduct. Accordingly, I am today converting Mr. Arenas’ indefinite suspension without pay to a suspension without pay for the remainder of the 2009-10 season, and am also suspending Mr. Crittenton without pay, effective immediately, for the remainder of the 2009-10 season.”
The short bus and idiot’s table just got one more rider:
You can add Javaris Crittenton to the “will dribble for food” line. NBA commissioner David Stern suspended Washington Wizards guards Gilbert Arenas and Crittenton for the remainder of the season for having guns in the locker room.
Stern said guns will not be tolerated! And to top it off, both players were suspended without pay for their roles in bringing guns into the Wizards’ locker room.
Arenas is in the 2nd season of a 6-year, $111 million contract.
Taste the Brew to read Stern’s full statement on these two dumbasses.
[Commissioner Stern's full statement]
“The NBA has conducted a thorough investigation of events relating to this matter.
“It is not disputed that, following an argument on the team’s flight home from a game in Phoenix, both Mr. Arenas and Mr. Crittenton brought guns to the Verizon Center locker room and — with other players and team personnel present or nearby — displayed them to one another in a continuation of their dispute. The players engaged in this conduct despite a specific rule set forth in the collective bargaining agreement between the NBA and the Players Association prohibiting players from possessing a weapon at an NBA facility, and reminders of this prohibition given annually by the NBA to players both in writing and in person.
“The issue here is not about the legal ownership and possession of guns, either in one’s home or elsewhere. It is about possession of guns in the NBA workplace, which will not be tolerated.
“I have met separately with Mr. Arenas and with Mr. Crittenton. Both have expressed remorse for their actions and an understanding of the seriousness of their transgressions. Both have volunteered to engage in community service in order to turn the lessons they have learned into an educational message for others. I accept fully the sincerity of their expressions of regret and intent to create something positive from this incident.
“Nevertheless, there is no justification for their conduct. Accordingly, I am today converting Mr. Arenas’ indefinite suspension without pay to a suspension without pay for the remainder of the 2009-10 season, and am also suspending Mr. Crittenton without pay, effective immediately, for the remainder of the 2009-10 season.”
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