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Witches' Brew | White Jesus Approved Rss

That Time Black Twitter Took Over The #AskRKelly Chat


Posted by Witch Hazel | Posted in r kelly, Twitter | Posted on 11-12-2013

R Kelly

Black Twitter is sooo my friend in my head. Though it can be a little ratchet at times, it’s always there when you really need it to check fools. Yesterday, someone in the R. Kelly camp (or maybe HE’s just that dumb!) thought it would be a swell idea for R-ah to answer some questions from his fans on Twitter to promote his new album, “Black Panties.” This person is probably filing for unemployment and Obamacare today. Let’s just say Twitter (ok, there were some white people too, but today they’re part of the Black Twitter union) held no punches when it came to reminding Mr. Kelly of his checkered past.

Let’s go to the tweets, shall we?
Taste The Brew for some of the best tweets


For Your Viewing Pleasure: R. Kelly’s “Trapped in the Closet” #568,092


Posted by Witch Hazel | Posted in Brew Tube, r kelly, trapped in the closet, will you watch | Posted on 17-10-2012

The Tyler Perry of hood love stories is back with chapter 23 of Trapped in the Closet. R. Kelly is bringing his hip-hopera to IFC next month, but you can catch a peek right here. The new chapters promise more mystery, drama and plot twists. R. Kelly plays two new characters: Dr. Perry, a therapist and Beeno, a powerful underworld kingpin. You can’t get this kind of cinema down at the Magic Johnson the-ater here, people. Get into it…
Taste The Brew to watch


Brew Bits: R. Kelly Thinks The IRS Is a Non-MF’n Factor


Posted by Witch Hazel | Posted in brew bits, r kelly, taxes | Posted on 09-09-2012

Taxes? What taxes? R. Kelly is not answering Uncle Sam’s calls…and hasn’t been for a good seven years. He already owes the tax man close to five million, now TMZ reports he’s got to add another $1.3 million to that tab. Kelly didn’t file from 2005-2010 and, apparently, he didn’t file for the year 2011 either, bringing his taxes owed total to $6,227,767.82. He’d better believe he can fly to the bank and handle that. His rep says Kelly is already communicating with the IRS to take care of the situation. Does that mean episodes 40-143 of “Trapped In The Closet” are on the way?




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Brew Commentary: That Time R. Kelly Wrote A Book


Posted by Elphaba Of The Brew | Posted in brew commentary, r kelly | Posted on 23-06-2012



R&B star R. Kelly is set to open up about his sex crime allegations for the first time in a new tell-all memoir.

In 2002, the I Believe I Can Fly hitmaker was indicted on 21 counts of child pornography, based on a sex tape he allegedly made with an underage girl.

The singer was later cleared of all charges but the case tarnished his reputation and he has refused to talk about the scandal ever since.

But now the 45 year old will finally share all about his career and tumultuous past in new tome Soulacoaster: The Diary of Me, which is set for release on 28 June (12).

Record producer Antonio ‘L.A.’ Reid, who has had the chance to read an early draft of the book, tells AllHipHop.com, “In the tradition of legendary soul singer/songwriters, R. Kelly has defined his own unique style of genius while influencing an entire generation of singers. He is the pure essence of soul, and in Soulacoaster you’ll discover the untold story behind every song.” – Via Contact Music

I have no words for this book that R. Kelly has written… pardon me let me stretch my air quote fingers… “written”.  Whatever man, tell your story, whatever you are saying it is.  As a woman (with a vagina) I find it hard to be a fan of the alleged Pedo, whether he writes a song I can 2 step to or not. But, that’s just me.

I would for  a moment like to take a look at this book cover.  Dude. You couldn’t find anything less um… phallic? I hope this isn’t what’s going into production. You look like you have landed in the land of a thousand peens and you’re about to get that pee you so- allegedly- enjoy doling out.

Who are your handlers? They are playing you! You’re a product of years marked with scandal. Someone like you is supposed to get the “Head shot of Contrition”.  You know: sports jacket the price of a car note, expensive custom tailored shirt, no tie – to show you’re sincere. On your face, less than a smile, not a quite a sneer…but a stoic “I’m still standing, I love kittens and puppies steely gaze”.  Oh, R. your team hates you.  You look like you’re the guest of honor at a fancy prison circle jerk. Maybe that’s the big revelation in the book? In that case, well played.

Step in the name of love, brah.


Tyrese, R. Kelly & Chris Brown Unite For The Worst Song In The History Of Music


Posted by Witch Hazel | Posted in brew music, Chris Brown, r kelly, Tyrese, What's your call? | Posted on 12-06-2010

Who: Tyrese, R. Kelly & Chris Brown
What: A ratchet song about a woman being so fine they wanna get her pregnant

*blank muddafu… stare*

I long for the days of Teddy, Luther and Freddie.

Anyway, hot song or hot garbage? What’s your call?

Rip via Miss Jia

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