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LA Divas… Fa Reals?

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Posted by Elphaba Of The Brew | Posted on 10-09-2014

Thanks a lot (?) to a friend for alerting me  that this show was nigh upon us…

(NOTE: a Witch realizes this aired last night..and totally didn’t watch!)

LA Divas. Not to be confused with R & B Divas: Momma I Just Wanna Sang or Slores and Slags of LA Looking for Love When Suicide Aint Enuff.

I don’t even need to read the project description to tell you all: “A random Collection of Black Women, some with actual acting credentials will be complaining.  There may be some fighting. There will be a break down or two. And there WILL be horribly bad weave. It has been written.”

First of all, I would like to discuss the use of the word ‘Diva’ in itself.  We’re really effing stretching here, TV One.  Per Wikiepeida, every Phoenix Grad’s encyclopedia: A diva (/ˈdvə/; Italian: [ˈdiːva]) is a celebrated female singer; a woman of outstanding talent in the world of opera, and by extension in theatre, cinema and popular music. The meaning of diva is closely related to that of prima donna.

Or if you Ask Beyoncé…Grad of Pelvic Thrust and Onsies.

Now with either fairly acceptable definition in mind, let’s look at the cast…. Shall we?

 

hwd_lisa_0737_v2Lisa Wu:  Official Birther of Spawns of Sweat BKA Former RHOA cast member that no one misses. Seriously, I’d rather watch Tight Teeth  say “jewerrry” on endless loop, than hear about how the former reality persona (I shant not call her a star) is now a serious thespian. The  Julliard trained cast of Orange Is the New Black, spits pon your direction. And may the ghost of Nene Leake’s hairhats past haunt you forever.

 

 

 

 

hwd_paula_jai_1538_v3Paula Jai Parker: She’s been in the game fo’ years, with an impressive list of Blacktress classics under her belt.  The Taraji P. Henson of the 90′s if you will.  She should at least be playing someone’s auntie on a bad cable show.  I feel bad if she’s struggling. But not bad enough to watch.

 

 

 

 

 

hwd_golden_0913_v3

Golden Brooks: Poor kid…I don’t know if Maya was anyone’s favorite “Girlfriend”, but as part of an ensemble cast of a beloved Negroidian show, for 5011 years, she should at least be on a TV Land show, that no one watches. “Cold in Texas” or some ish.

 

 

 

 

 

 

ELISE

Elise Neal: you seem like a nice enough lady. But, I always call you “Not Tamala Jones” and I don’t see myself stopping that any time soon.  Well…and since Tamela is a gainfully employed regular on “Castle”, might I suggest many of these highly acceptable and wonderfully vague career alternatives to get you through these lean audition times: “consultant”, “real estate agent”, “mortgage broker” or “stylist’. Go diversify your bonds, boo.

 

 

 

Rounding out the cast.

hwd_countess_0235gc3a7c3b4v2

The one.  The only. Countess. Mugfugging. Vaughn.  Diva. Sigh.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Did you watch? Will you bother?

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Brewchies At The Movies: All Is By My Side

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Posted by Witch Hazel | Posted on 10-08-2014

All_Is_By_My_Side

I’d been waiting for a good while for Andre 3000′s turn as Jimi Hendrix in All Is By My Side, so when I noticed it was finally playing in a few local theaters, I immediately made time to check it out. I wanted to love this movie SO.BADLY. But, I didn’t. All Is By My Side focused on a short window of Hendrix’s life in London, as his star was beginning to rise. This is not your typical biopic, however. There are no flashback scenes and no real emphasis on the artist’s creative process. It’s simply the makings of Jimi the rock star, the early days of his rise to greatness, which –on the surface– doesn’t have to be a bad thing. The film was written and directed by John Ridley, the Oscar-winning screenwriter of 12 Years a Slave. We get a minor mention of Jimi’s past, where he comes from and his relationship with his family, one studio session and just a few full-on performance scenes. Hendrix’s music was not licensed for the movie, so there’s no ‘scuse me while I kiss the sky moment in this one. Just a Beatles cover and a would-be jam session with Eric Clapton. This version of Jimi doesn’t even come across as someone you’d want to root for. The thing that bugged me most about the film is the notion that British white women seemed to shape his career and even tell him how to perform his music. I mean, maybe they dropped a note or two in the suggestion box, but 3000′s easy-going, spacey portrayal of Hendrix leaves you with the impression that he did what he wanted regardless of what others thought. You’re also left with the impression that Hendrix didn’t connect to the struggle of his people back home — something widely discussed on these here interwebs. I wanted to love this. I wanted to leave feeling like an expert on Jimi. Maybe there will be a sequel or something. I still love Three Stacks. I think he’s got a future as an actor. But this one left me looking at my watch like…is it over? It was beautifully shot, very colorful and the wardrobe styling was awesome, butummmerah… I give this one 2 out of 5 cauldrons.

All Is By My Side opened September 26th. Check your local listings for show times.

Have you seen All Is By My Side? What did you think? Did you love it, or nah?

Image via Darko Entertainment
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Brewchies At The Movies: I Am Ali

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Posted by Witch Hazel | Posted on 10-07-2014

I_Am_Ali

A new film gives us an intimate look inside the makings of boxer/father/activist Muhammad Ali. I Am Ali: The Man Behind The Legend – An Intimate Portrait paints a vivid picture of Ali as a fully-realized man, not just the living legend with the witty comebacks and pronouncements of his greatness. We see how Cassius Clay discovered boxing, came of age, advocated for the black community and realized Islam was the way for his life. Most of all, the film artfully intertwines news and file footage, as well as audio that Ali recorded of his children nearly 40 years ago. We hear from three of Ali’s nine children and one former wife in the film. A common theme in I Am Ali is how he was able to prophesy his future and walk into his own truth. Even the act of recording his children and the emphasis he put on how the tapes would become part of history and important to the kids as they aged served as proof of his ability to foresee the future. In the film, we also hear from his peers in sports (Jim Brown), his opponents (George Foreman) and many of the men who helped shape his boxing career. Take a peek.

The film is a brilliant ode to a man in the golden years of his life. I give it 5 out of 5 cauldrons! Brewchies, bring your tissues because you’ll probably fall apart near the end and leave with this face.

I Am Ali hits theaters and On Demand October 10th. Visit the website to find out where it will be playing.

Will you be seeing this one?

Image via Focus Features
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VOTE For Us: 2014 Black Weblog Awards

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Posted by Witch Hazel | Posted on 10-07-2014

Black_Weblog_Badge_2014Thank you, Brewchies, for your support in the nominations stage of the Black Weblog Awards. WE MADE IT!

Once again, we’re nominated in the Best Entertainment Blog, Best Group Blog and Best Humor Blog categories. We also made the cut for the new category: Best Facebook Page! First round voting opens TODAY. View the full list of nominees here. We’d love your vote to make it to the finals stage. Winners will be announced in early November and honored during a live ceremony at the 2015 Blogging While Brown Conference next June in Austin,TX.

VOTE VOTE VOTE

Thanks for your continued support!
Love,
The Witches

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Restore Your Nails & Get Fall Ready with Probelle + GIVEAWAY

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Posted by Witch Hazel | Posted on 10-07-2014

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The weather change from summer to fall can take a toll on skin, hair and nails. Less humidity in the air and cooler weather always cause changes in my look, whether it’s cracked skin or janky (an official beauty term) cuticles. But, thankfully, I’ve found a new way to keep my nails in check as the seasons change. It’s called Probelle! Hop on over to my review on Beautiful Brown Girls to find out more about the product and enter to WIN your own below.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Thanks to Probelle for sponsoring the giveaway. I received the products in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts are my own.
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